SuperCaliFashionistic

Sorry Miss Winslet, but the other Kate wore it better once than you could ... twice. There's not much hope when you're up against an übermodel.

Looks like light up dresses and egg carriages don't cut it anymore, because popes are the new accessory du jour. Leave the fake Pradas and Chanels to Lady Gaga, because a knockoff Benedict XVI is the only kind of faux worth having.

You can tell this guy is slightly miffed that his spotlight was usurped by a faux member of the Vatican. Even kings have to defer to popes!

Not to be outdone by the glossy‐haired Biebs or the sequin‐suited halves of LMFAO, Shakira showed up dressed like a giant present. Apparently, she'd taken a few tips from TSwift (a.k.a. the Kaufman Franco magpie), as she accessorized her sequined dress with glittery heels, a glittery clutch, and what looked like Beyonce's signature glittery pantyhose.

In typical supermodel fashion, Karolina chose Chanel. After all, how many people can pull off the above dress without looking like they got stuck in a tablecloth? Although it wasn't horrible, it wasn't terribly flattering either. I hate to say this of haute couture, but it looked more like an over-blinged Vegas costume than a runway-worthy masterpiece. Not to mention that her neck looked inordinately long in its Paris Hilton-esque choker, and the sloping cut of the sides was doing nothing for her seemingly scrawny shoulders. Combined with her 6' tall svelteness, Karolina looked more like a cross between a bizarrely clad alien and an oversized avian creature. Compounding the tackiness was a strand of fake-looking, unnaturally white pearls and golden Jimmy Choos that glittered (hello, kindergarten dress up?). And, um, unpedicured toes - we get that it's nice to go natural, but it just looks like you forgot your appointment at the salon. The metallic Chanel bag with vaguely sparkly leather on the sides didn't help matters much, either. Hey, at least her hair was cute!

The only positive thing I have to say about this is that the OMG necklace is fitting, because that's exactly what I thought when I stumbled across above photo. However, please don't wear an outfit that makes you look like a Cabbage Patch Kid.

Not to mention they would be sweltering in their multiple layers, considering that desert temperatures can rise to over 130 degrees. And a conveniently placed palm tree? No way. You'd be lucky to find an occasional cactus.

Kerry Washington looks appropriately fabulous, although she somehow managed to match her dress exactly to the red carpet. If she had a train, that might have been somewhat problematic.