SuperCaliFashionistic

Looks like light up dresses and egg carriages don't cut it anymore, because popes are the new accessory du jour. Leave the fake Pradas and Chanels to Lady Gaga, because a knockoff Benedict XVI is the only kind of faux worth having.

You can tell this guy is slightly miffed that his spotlight was usurped by a faux member of the Vatican. Even kings have to defer to popes!

Not to be outdone by the glossy‐haired Biebs or the sequin‐suited halves of LMFAO, Shakira showed up dressed like a giant present. Apparently, she'd taken a few tips from TSwift (a.k.a. the Kaufman Franco magpie), as she accessorized her sequined dress with glittery heels, a glittery clutch, and what looked like Beyonce's signature glittery pantyhose.

Despite our initial doubts, Karl Lagerfeld chose well when he selected the Gossip Girl actress to front his handbag line. Miss Lively, remarkably, manages to convey the facial expression she so obviously lacks onscreen. The stunning blonde in the photos is no longer Blake Lively, but a real-life Serena van der Woodsen - beautiful, mysterious, and untouchable. There's an unmistakable undertone of loneliness and melancholy in the empty doors, silvery lighting, and shadowy mirrors. Lagerfeld doesn't show us the fireworks and champagne, but the party girl when the lights are off and the festivities are over. Yet even when stripped of the bright, hard glitter, Lively is nothing if not polished and pristine. There's nothing worn or rough about her perfectly tousled tresses or artfully smoky eyes. Its perfect tragedy only heightens its ethereal pulchritude; there's something exquisitely painful about sadness manifested in beauty, and Lagerfeld captures that to a tee. Forget about Freja and Heidi; this is easily his best campaign to date.

Apparently, her lack of brows didn't faze her in the least. Nor did her bubble-gum pink bob or the supremely awkward length of her bangs, chopped straight across the middle of her forehead (hello, Katy Perry!). Gaga tweeted the cover photo with the proud exclamation: "They used to call me rabbit teeth in school, and now I'm a real live VOGUE BEAUTY QUEEN!" Whatever you say, Gaga.

P.S. Is it just me, or does she still look like a bunny?

1. Justin Bieber uncannily resembles a pasty midget.

2. Neck scarves are for people who actually have necks.

3. Miley Cyrus is wearing the Nike sweatbands I was going to buy for tennis. You know, the kind meant for an actual sport, not parading around stage sans culottes.

The only positive thing I have to say about this is that the OMG necklace is fitting, because that's exactly what I thought when I stumbled across above photo. However, please don't wear an outfit that makes you look like a Cabbage Patch Kid.

Not to mention they would be sweltering in their multiple layers, considering that desert temperatures can rise to over 130 degrees. And a conveniently placed palm tree? No way. You'd be lucky to find an occasional cactus.